Sunday, April 26, 2015

ONE DAY AT A TIME

 ONE DAY AT A TIME
she stood at the top of the stairs crying

 your becoming your father

i'm thinking cool I love that man

now shes gone it took me 30 years to understand

I have an addictive personality

i'm addicted to everything bad is my reality

don't be sad i'll be ok i'll be me again some day

assume the risk there's no humility

i'm still the man i used to be

look close inside of me

there's a hole that you can see' through
'
there's a light at the end where i can live my life again

there's a place i can go

to talk to people wow! finally someone who knows

now you need to tell someone you hit rock bottom

there's a group where you can tell them your problem

 they been there but you don't know where you are

maybe this has gone to far

but your living your life inside this bubble

you know it''s no good and your headed for trouble

we're hear to listen not now don't talk just make a decision

is your life out of control have you hurt everyone you know

stole pawned and done everything beyond

then it's for you to hear this story of mine

how i made her cry . i was F'' UP and it hurt i'm not gonna lie

she never forgave me it was never the same between her and I

there's nothing in the world than losing your soul mate

and if I didn't hurt her would we still be together today

it took till ten minutes ago yo figure that out

I now have figured out what y purpose in life is all about

everyone i ever loved i shit

it's my own affliction that i never had a son

how could i put him through what i have done

i can't blame no one for what i've done

i don't remember the day it all begun

when your high everyday is the same

you feel this disaster and a wall of shame

and don't count me out i'll be back again





Saturday, April 25, 2015

IT'S BEEN AWHILE SO HOW HAVE YOU BEEN

 IT'S BEEN AWHILE SO HOW HAVE YOU BEEN
mom hows dad it's been a year now

and were all still feeling sad

I you both had to leave us and go

but for our reasons why we'll never know

i know some day we'll see you again

but it's taking so long we get sad now and then

yes mom were getting by

but time to time we still cry

life is going so fast you never know which day will be my last

there's been times when i wanted to take my life

but I can never seem to find the knife

maybe life's really not that bad

you make me believe this addiction I can beat

and someday again I can be me

every now and then I wonder how i'll go

will it be cancer a question no one knows

well it's been awhile since I seen the day

that you went away

it's been awhile how have you been

I can't wait for you to come back again

LIFE ON THE ROCKS

 LIFE ON THE ROCKS
life on the rocks

being bullied by the tough guys

they think their some super jocks

they only bully you cause their life suck

your so much more

and the ones that love you will always adore

when life's on the rocks

get off the floor

so you find yourself addicted

and the decision to live has become conflicted

kick this affliction and get off the ground

cause your families no good when your not around

lifes on the rocks

hes cheating still not home at 12 o clock

don't stress your not alone

at some point hes gotta come home

so you put the gun to your head

but you know your children can't find you dead

now for some comes the end

 giving in to life on the rocks

there you go looking down at yourself lying dead

and everything you know

walking by shaking their heads

what a waste they talk will there be good things said

will you leave this world and go to the next

now you want to live

life on the rocks you want to fix

and now your stuck between life and death

there's no suicide in heaven

god ask you how many people you hurt

by causing your death

if you could count more than seven

so remember when life's on the rocks

is a reason but just not enough

rather you been bullied or plagued by addiction

whatever your affliction is no reason

 no matter your depression caused by the  sad seasons

if you lose to life on the rocks

heaven will not answer your knock

Friday, April 17, 2015

DON'T SAY GOODBYE

     DON'T SAY GOODBYE

WHOSE THE NEW GUY IN TOWN

I SEE HOW HE CAUGHT YOUR EYE

I CAN HEAR YOUR HEART START TO POUND

WHEN EVER HES AROUND

IF YOUR GONNA LEAVE DON'T SAY GOODBYE

I DON'T WANT TO KNOW CAUSE I'LL START TO CRY

IT SEEMS AS THOUGH EVERY TIME HES AROUND

YOU TWIRL YOUR HAIR AND YOU STOP TO STARE

WHEN SOMEONE NEW CAME TO TOWN YOU NEVER CARED

YOU SURE HAVE CHANGED THESE DAYS

I CAN HEAR THE SOFT CRACKLE IN YOUR VOICE

I KNOW CAUSE YOU WHISPERED TO ME THAT WAY

I USED TO LAUGH WHEN YOU CRACKLED IN EVERYTHING YOU SAY

THAT WAS SO LONG AGO

WHEN YOU LOVED ME BACK IN THE DAY

YOU TWIRLED YOUR HAIR LAUGHED AND HELD ME EVERYWHERE

IF YOUR GONNA GO DON'T SAY GOODBYE

LETS ACT LIKE I DIDN'T KNOW

TELLING OUR FRIENDS YOUR MISSING

I LEFT THE LIGHTS ON TILL THE LAST ONES DONE

MY ANSWERING MACHINE SAID HONEY COME HOME

I'M TO STUBBORN AND PROUD TO ADMIT I'M ALL ALONE

AND IF YOU CALL AND LEAVE A MESSAGE DON'T SAY GOODBYE

I PLAYED YOUR MESSAGE ABOUT A MILLION TIMES

BUT THIS TIME I KNEW IT WAS THE END

YOU SAID I CAN'T TELL YOU WHY

AND ENDING WITH GOODBYE OVER AND OVER AGAIN

I CALLED HER BACK AND SAID I WAS HAPPY FOR HER

AND I'D BE HAPPY TO LIE TO HER AGAIN JUST TO HEAR HER VOICE

 SO I LIED AGAIN AND SAID THAT SOMEONE CAME ALONG

I KNOW I SHOULDN'T LIE I KNOW IT'S WRONG

I JUST COULDN'T TELL HER I'M ALL ALONE

AND NO ONE WILL EVER COME ALONG

IT CAME OUT OF MY MOUTH AFTER I LIED

FOR THE FIRST TIME FOR THE LAST TIME I SAID DON'T SAY GOODBYE

DON'T SAY GOODBYE UNLESS YOU CAN TELL ME WHY

Tuesday, April 14, 2015

I'LL NEVER GET OVER YOU

I’LL NEVER GET OVER YOU
I’ll never get over you

It’s never been the same

Ill never get over you

 I know i'm to blame

Since the day you walked away

have I burned out inside the flame

You said there’s nothing left to say

can't you stop playing this game

holding your heart inside my head

is  driving me insane

our friends tell me they seen you the other day

 smiling in the arms of another man

since your gone i'm nothing but all alone

without you hear the sun doesn't rise

 I’ll never understand why you said goodbye

and I called you the other day

you couldn't even answer the phone

I guess there's nothing left to say

 my heart is broke it can't take these games you play

this isn't who you are

Ill never get over you

when you left my world fell apart

I tried so hard but i'll never forget

your something that I must admit

 that I love you as much as the day we met

I’ll never get over you

I still feel  the moment you left

I remember the last thing you said

You couldn't say it to my face

I guess our love was a lie you lead

I remember goodbye in the letter I read

it's not what you said

Its what you didn't say

when the day comes to an end

I'd take you back again

I hear now you got four kids and a trailer

I thought I’d feel better you ended up with a failure

ending up with some broke down sailor

it's something you said you'd never do

then again you said I'd always be with you

with all  the hell you put me through

I still can't get over you

I’d give my life

 if you called me up today

and go  go through it all again

even after 30 years  I still feel the pain

i'll never get over you

and all the time we spent

Thursday, April 9, 2015

A REASON TO RECOVER

A REASON TO RECOVER
each and everyday I take  one day at a time

the life i've been living is not mine

i've been so sick,this addictions so hard to kick

can't remember the last time I stood alone

I hit rock bottom suddenly i'm six feet under

I ask you to let me die,I feel a tear fall from the sky

you never looked down on me you never ask why

a knife appears in my hand

is this recovery or thee end

 I can't break this spell i'm under

if I don't want to end up dead I better recover

there's a new world out there everyday I discover

the worlds different than it used to be

or was I to high to see,popping pills so I don't have to be me

you lifted me off the floor

if I wanna recover I must go through this door

i'm not going to lie,it's a long road ahead

at time you'll wish you were dead

each day becomes more clear

you remember the reason your here

NA meetings gives my life meaning

a reason to recover for yourself and no other